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dalekpatronus) wrote2008-04-09 03:07 am
dalekpatronus) wrote2008-04-09 03:07 am
Entry tags:
And I Need You Like A Heart Needs A Beat.
Ugh. I love how my body hates me.
So maybe me not being able to sleep earlier wasn't because of a dream or whatever. I'm realizing that all the stuff just keep piling up, so tomorrow night if I'm functional I'm going to finish filling out the job applications I've started. If only so that I can force myself out of bed and possibly have benefits. It ticks me off that I feel like I have to ignore everything that's going on with my body because I can't afford to go to the doctor right now. And I wouldn't tell my mother, simply because I would never hear the end of it if she forced me to go, since I'm sure a trip to the doctor would end up being horribly expensive.
It's gotten to the point that I have issues standing for extended periods of time because of dizziness. This is very cool, I assure you. The nausea is almost a daily occurrence anymore, that sandwich I wanted to try and make earlier today? Never happened, I got part of the way through a piece of toast and ended up throwing it all right back up.
Then there was the fantastic spillage of my iced drink all over the front of myself that I couldn't feel until I put my hand in it. I'm beginning to wonder if I don't have a pinched nerve somewhere, because certain parts of my body aren't registering the hot and cold anymore. We'll see if I can actually manage a shower tomorrow without feeling like I might pass out, somehow I doubt that a cold shower would be good for me but the heat ends up just making me ten times more dizzy. Then of course there was the random numb sensation on the top of my head and the even more random nosebleeds, that was super fun too. That tingly patch on my head has just now stopped so I'm hopeful.
I did manage a burrito and some fries, which I'm sure was a bad idea but they sounded so yummy. Even now my body is rebelling and trying to get it all to come back up. Which fails, because I thought it was actually going to end up staying down. So in a vain attempt to keep from vomiting again, I'm going to lay down and HOPE that tomorrow looks better.
We'll see how that goes though~.
So maybe me not being able to sleep earlier wasn't because of a dream or whatever. I'm realizing that all the stuff just keep piling up, so tomorrow night if I'm functional I'm going to finish filling out the job applications I've started. If only so that I can force myself out of bed and possibly have benefits. It ticks me off that I feel like I have to ignore everything that's going on with my body because I can't afford to go to the doctor right now. And I wouldn't tell my mother, simply because I would never hear the end of it if she forced me to go, since I'm sure a trip to the doctor would end up being horribly expensive.
It's gotten to the point that I have issues standing for extended periods of time because of dizziness. This is very cool, I assure you. The nausea is almost a daily occurrence anymore, that sandwich I wanted to try and make earlier today? Never happened, I got part of the way through a piece of toast and ended up throwing it all right back up.
Then there was the fantastic spillage of my iced drink all over the front of myself that I couldn't feel until I put my hand in it. I'm beginning to wonder if I don't have a pinched nerve somewhere, because certain parts of my body aren't registering the hot and cold anymore. We'll see if I can actually manage a shower tomorrow without feeling like I might pass out, somehow I doubt that a cold shower would be good for me but the heat ends up just making me ten times more dizzy. Then of course there was the random numb sensation on the top of my head and the even more random nosebleeds, that was super fun too. That tingly patch on my head has just now stopped so I'm hopeful.
I did manage a burrito and some fries, which I'm sure was a bad idea but they sounded so yummy. Even now my body is rebelling and trying to get it all to come back up. Which fails, because I thought it was actually going to end up staying down. So in a vain attempt to keep from vomiting again, I'm going to lay down and HOPE that tomorrow looks better.
We'll see how that goes though~.
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