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RENAMED!

kamicomplex → brobotics.

Still the same Sonia that doesn't update about important things nearly enough. YOU HAVE BEEN INFORMED, SO NO FREAKING OUT, KAY?

In other news, I've been coding adverts and stuff all night for the game that heartaddiction and I have been working on. And on Wednesday I almost broke my toe. /o/

Words, words, words.

I'm putting my feelings into words. Or something.

Today was busier than hell for some reason, I ended up so frazzled that my hands were shaking and I really just felt like I wanted to fight someone.

Something at work kind of got to me more than it should have. I feel that I'm more than friendly to everyone I work with. They all seem to like talking to me, to the point that they are close to getting into trouble for doing it too much. I overheard one of the girls saying that her birthday was this weekend and she invited one of the stockers to her party. Not that I'm into party scenes much these days, but it seemed a little...idk, rude? Like, if I weren't going to invite someone to something, I would make sure not to ask someone else in front of them. I probably wouldn't have really felt like going anyway, but it still would have been nice to be considered, I guess? So yeah, no reason for it to bother me, but I JUST LIKE PEOPLE TO BE CONSIDERATE OR SOMETHING. Maybe it's really just because it's the second time in two weeks something shitty like that happened. The downside to keeping most people at a distance? Maybe, idek.

Then just blah blah blah, more Shawn and Stan bullshit. I'm at the point where I'm just doing that thing of listening and not really engaging, only hearing enough to make sure I can respond if the answer requires more than an 'uh huh', 'oh yeah', or a 'no kidding'. I think mom got all butthurt when I didn't think it was funny when she said she joked about wanting to 'stalk' him and try to find out what he was doing. It's not funny, it's not cute, it's obnoxious. At this point I really feel she should just withdraw from the whole thing, since she's way past being unbiased. She claims she is, but she's not really. I think it's because she's BEEN THERE BEFORE, but it's really not much of an excuse when she is supposed to be helping them both out.

The rest of the day was good though, got home and tried to rest for a bit but I was still too antsy and a little...stir crazy or something. So heartaddiction and I ended up going out and getting some shopping done now that I've gotten paid and stuff. It was nice just being out and about, not having to worry about getting back right away or being bothered with any of this ridiculous shit.

But the highlight? THE HIGHLIGHT?

Shamrock Shake. I had been wanting one so bad since I saw the sign in the McD's window last weekend. And guess what? It was delicious. GONE IN A FLASH. Maybe I'll have another one. SOON.

I have RP stuff I was supposed to do, I think. But the motivation has been so low I'm not even sure what to do on that front. :( SAD FACE.

Yessss. This week is over.

I need to dye my hair tonight and possibly go get a hair cut tomorrow. We'll see how that ends up going.

I had something else I was planning on doing, but I can't really remember it at the moment.

I think maybe I was going to be lazy and do this post in the form of bullet points, but I could only come up with two things. And I'll do them anyway.

☆ A manager wears really inappropriate lipstick to work. There's no reason to wear WHORE RED when you're supposed to be management. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised since she pays 100+ dollars to have someone make her hair look like crap.

☆ I judge people that let their small children go out in public looking like they haven't bathed or had their hair combed in a week. There's no excuse for it.

And...something else, but I've lost it now.

skdjskldfjsdkj

Goddamn, today was so much more annoying than it needed to be. I woke up in a really good mood and then once I got to work it was just like pfffffft, auto deflate or something. Idk, maybe it was just the fact that I was told a bunch of bullshit before any of it really needed to be said.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better and more relaxing, provided that things get back to normal.

Just a few more days. Everyone at work keeps asking me if I'm excited about my trip and I really am. Already trying to plan out things, but more I'm just looking forward to the company I'll be keeping. That's mostly what the whole thing is about anyway, the chance to have more time.

Still really need gas in my car. Still really need a haircut. Today I got so fed up with my hair that I just pushed the part over a little farther than it usually falls and slapped so much product into it not even the wind could move it. Sometimes I really hate the fact that my hair is naturally curly, I really enjoy most of the styles more suited for people with straight hair so much more.

Ugggggh. My head hurts so bad and not a thing is touching it. I really would have liked to come home and take a nap right away, but my mom wanted to go and look at new recliners for her office. In the end we didn't find anything for her, so it was a little disappointing to push through all of that with no result.

I really was tempted just to stay home today, but I pushed through it. Had a couple of firsts at work today. One being a man that was so rude that I didn't even know how I should deal with him. Me trying to answer his question should not have gotten my head taken off and being told flat out that he wasn't talking to me. And a second try prompted the response from him that he still wasn't talking to me, he was talking to the woman behind the desk next to me. At any rate, it was like one extreme to the other, I helped a young man find some kombu and he got so excited when I offered to show him where it was that he called me a Goddess. Twice.

Bossu and Cindy called me into her office at one point during the day, the setup actually had me a little worried over what was going on but in the end I guess it turned out all right. They've decided to move me again so that I spend two days at the customer service desk and at least two days in the gift shop. The gift shop I don't mind so much, only that time might go by a little more slowly than I would like. At least I'll be able to have access to a radio and I won't really have to deal with too many obnoxious customers. I think they'll probably change it back quickly enough, at least I hope as much. What I really want this to be for them is a learning experience, a chance to see just how much I do for them at the front desk. The last couple of weeks I've been off three days in a row and on Monday I come back to a disaster area. We'll see how it all goes though, at the very least it's a chance for me to do something that I might like a little better. Plus I'll get a chance just to hang out with all the Sanrio stuff we have back there.

I was really trying to make the best of today. Chance to make up the hours blah blah blah blah...

My head hurts so bad I can't see out of my right eye and I've been fighting back the urge to vomit all day long. I drank three liters of water hoping that it was just the weather or dehydration that was making me feel so sick, but all that managed to do was make me run to the bathroom even more. I should have seen it coming with the way that my neck was hurting last night, but I really was hoping for the best. I had to medicate so much that I think I ended up making my stomach hurt even more, so it seems like today was just a day that was destined to be bad.

All I want right now is a hug and to curl up and cry, though I can't see how the crying would really be beneficial. If anything it would just make my head hurt more and then I'd be even more unhappy about it.

I'm going to keep my fingers crossed that a nap will be helpful, I really don't want to wake up and still feel this awful.

Just passing the time. Or something.

If I'm not better tomorrow it will be five days of being stuck at home, here's hoping for the best. /o/ Stuff and things, stuff and things. I think I actually ran out of things I feel up to doing, so the last two hours were spent doing nothing but staring at the ceiling and pushing one of my cats off the computer chair with my foot. There was some thinking in there too, but I did my best to keep it from getting too deep. So much for that, all I ended up with was an annoyed cat and a gigantic headache. Now I'm taking another dose of Theraflu and going to bed. I have to be better by Monday afternoon so that I can actually function at work. Or at least do something that resembles it.

Have a meme. Do it. Or not.

PURSUING MY TRUE SELF.

skljfskdjdsf

Sleeping soundly and then coughing fit! DX

Today felt terribly long and I wasn't able to focus worth shit.  I'm damn lucky I actually finished the project I was given at work.  I think a majority of it was the fact that I was preoccupied all day, wrestling with the idea of doing something.  In the end I decided it was better to just leave things as they were tonight.  It's something that needs to be handled before I work on Tuesday, which doesn't really give me much time.  I have a feeling that tomorrow night would be best, it's just a matter of motivating myself to put a plan into action.  Even now as I sit here and think about it all I can feel my chest tightening up and I can already tell that I'll be looking for a million reasons not to blahblahblah.

But at the same time I know I don't want another day like today.

It's times like this I realize just how much of a coward I can be.  

Balls. :|

The day was good for the most part, though I'm quite sure a majority of that was the fact that I was running on a shitload of caffeine.  Maybe the snow yesterday was something of a boost for me as well, that usually does have some kind of impact on the way that I feel.  I think I was a little disappointed that we didn't get more overnight.  For the best though, since I needed clear roads to get to work.

It wasn't so bad, again partially the caffeine, though some of it was the fact that I actually started bonding a little more with one of my coworkers. It wasn't until the end of the night, but it was still nice going over things with Sabra.  Kind of gave us both something of a chance to vent and let out a few things that didn't need to be kept in completely, getting fresh outlooks on things that we'd gone over with other people.

I realized there are a few things I'm worried about, almost to the point that I feel like thinking over them too much could be a problem. Some of it was brought up while Sabra and I were talking, but it didn't really help.  There's still not a solution and still too many doubts about certain things, all of them popping up at random intervals.  I'm trying not to let them get to me, not without actually knowing that there's something to worry over.  It's difficult though, sitting around and just waiting...

Let's see if I can get through today without wanting to punch someone in the face~.